I am very thankful for something I heard and remembered! when I was growing up.
I can't recall where I was, why I remember it, or who even said it, but I am so very thankful.
What was shared was when someone passes away or when something bad happens, it's normal for us to have unnormal or uncomfortable thoughts.
That advice has been very helpful for me all my life to not feel guilty about maybe some ill thoughts that might creep into my brain.
The example they gave was very simple, but very powerful. Let's say you are in your teens and your Grandpa passes away. But yet you had a slumber party to go to the weekend of the funeral. What was explained was, it's normal to feel bad about not getting to go to the slumber party.
Again, I can't remember who shared the story or if I read it in school or when/where I heard this, but it truly has helped me all these years.
Sometimes we do have kinda rude, non-normal and what seems like unnatural thoughts when we hear about bad news that might affect plans we had.
Of course, what you eventually do is your decision you have to live with, lol, but it's normal to have initial thoughts and concerns that sometimes don't make sense in our mind. Shouldn't I care more about going to see Grandpa? The feeling of selfishness, guilt or shame can be tough on us. However, because I learned at a very young age these thoughts are normal, I don't feel guilty or bad; I don't let them bother me and I don't feel bad about myself.
I'm sharing this to hopefully help others if you have thoughts that don't really make sense after bad news.
Remember: Normal!
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