I normally abhor and try to avoid the month of August. It's the month of my Mom's Birthday and also her Deathversary. She was my everything, and I hers. This is the first time in 6 years (yes, seriously) that I am not dreading the month. I am finally in a decent place with my heart and soul that has peace and happiness. It doesn't mean I don't think of her or don't miss her, it means I have finally moved over the very tall, tough grief mountain. Often the last few months people have mentioned they haven't seen me this happy in a very long time. Makes me smile that it's noticeable. :) Because... I do finally feel it again; and it feels good. You see, when one is depressed and sad and grieving for so long, it's actually kinda scary and uncomfortable to be happy again. It feels so weird to even smile or laugh because we aren't used to that - because we've been depressed for so long, showing happiness is actually out of our comfort zone. So, to finally feel peace and be able to express through my life the blessings upon me, I am very grateful for.
I Love You, Mom!
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