High School Skinny

I wanted to share my experiences with trying to achieve being High School Skinny (HSS) again.

If you were heavy in high school (or middle school) then I feel for you also because I know kids can be very mean and cruel.  :(  And I also know you can possibly be dramatized the rest of your life because you are consumed with trying to never go back to that very bad emotional time physically.  My Mom was this way - she was affected deeply her entire life because she was chubby as a child.  She was consumed about her weight, even when she was thin.

Then there are the skinny girls who the chubby girls can't figure out how in the world they can remain so skinny with all the crap they eat all dang day, every day!  In High School, most females are super thin.  We wear size zero jeans easily throughout the entire years, maybe growing into a size 1, or 3.  Either way, still HSS. 

We eat gobs and gobs of any type of food and never seem to gain weight.  We are like baby birds - eat all day!  And brag that we eat a lot, even junk food and fast food, with no weight gain.

Come college years, and we are less active and gain the "Freshman Fifteen" as is widely known throughout the campuses.  We gain some weight.  But - we actually look GOOD for our size (finally, we aren't a toothpick like HHS), but us women, tho, feel we look terrible and fat and unattractive.  While this isn't the start of the miserable stage, it's getting close.  And unfortunately, some women start to resort to shameful bad habits of throwing up to try to get back to HSS.  Or, most of us try to exercise.  Exercise seems to help lose a little weight, but we still aren't HSS.  And we start to obsess about it.

At about 30, our metabolism REALLY changes.  This is about the time we really, really gain more weight.  Unimaginable weight.  Sickening, keeping-ourselves-up-every-night worry weight.

This is the time in our lives that we try diet fads, try to work out, try anything to lose weight, only to feel like a failure because we can't keep up the routine.  We are fat.  And we hate it.  We hate ourselves and we are miserable.  We waste thousands and thousands of hours worrying and obsessing about our weight.  We think of our HSS-selves and wonder how to get her back.

We may work out and we may be successful at losing weight, but I am your older voice speaking to you right now:  You will never get back to HSS.  I only know about 2 out of 500 women who are back (or still) at HSS.  They either work out every single day, honestly know how to eat right and are extremely conscientious, have lucky genes, or are starving themselves (and anorexia is NOT pretty NOR HSS).

If you are the 2 in 500, God Bless You.

But if you aren't - and I'm prolly speaking to you - let me tell you right here and now to please stop the endless, wasted hours of wishing you were HSS again.  Enjoy life and be glad you are even alive.  Sure - be upset you are overweight and unhappy - but don't dwell on a fact that will never happen - being HSS again.

Trust me when I tell you it wont happen.  Trust me when I tell you to yes exercise and yes enjoy eating, but also try and learn to be happy with yourself.  Try to stop obsessing that you aren't HSS - it wont happen.  I wasted so many damn freaking time/months/years/ thinking about how thin I want to be like I used to be.

Even if you work out and eat right, you will lose unwanted weight, but you wont be HSS.

When you are close to 40 (like late 30s or so), you will finally, finally realize you wont ever be HSS.  And it's a relief!  It really is!  It's a relief to finally stop obsessing and spending so many stupid hours worrying about something that wont happen.

When you stop obsessing about becoming HSS, you actually become happier.  You aren't fighting with your own thoughts and spending countless hours upset. 

I hope you try and learn from my years of torture (yes, I call it torture) and stop obsessing and worrying about something that just wont happen.

Accept you wont be HSS.

It's okay, I promise.



(---- this timelime is based on my experience.  your timeline may be different, or you may have a had children and this timeline is all messed up.  either way, still not HSS.  sorry.  :(   ---)