Death, and Dates

I wanted to share something I learned the hard way.

My Mom's sister, my Aunt Gail, was born on Feb 6th.  She passed away in January 2011.

My Mom passed away August 19th, 2011.  Her birthday is August 8th.

So, I wouldn't experience my Mom's "death date" until after her "birthday date" the following year.

I know this is getting confusing... sorry.

I called my Uncle Ray on my Aunt Gail's birthday on Feb 6th, 2012.  To let him know I was thinking about him, and I was remembering his wife/my Aunt on her birthday.

He tells me that her birthday was "easy" compared to the day she passed away in January.  And I had NOT called him on that day.  :(

I didn't know.

I had no idea that "death dates" were tougher than "birthday dates," after recent passings.

I would find this out 6 months later when my mom's birthday was still mentioned from me, but it was the day she passed away (her "death date") that tore my heart out. 

Now I pay more attention when my friends mention "death dates" for their parents (or others) and I try to remember them.  It's a tough day.  Tougher than many realize.

Just a little advice, from little me.