Life

Life is...
funny but meaningful
interesting yet hard
weird and convoluted
hard but fulfilling
fun and tough

Emotions are...
real and fake
true yet tough
mindnumbing yet free
heartbreaking but thankful

Love is....
difficult but joyous
invisible yet blinding
hurtful yet fulfilling
real but fake
hard but easy
meaningful yet painful
true and also disappointment

Memories are...
joyous and sad
rollercoasters yet pleasurable
tearjerkers and smilemakers
warm yet cold
grateful and meaningful
fun but scary
learning experiences and forgetful

Life is a strange, powerful, learning experience of speed bump emotions in a vast space of air filled with feelings of roller coaster thoughts.

Regrets, fright, depression, anger.... the sun needs to shine more, warm my face, as I turn to the sky, forcing my eyes to squint as I soak in life and thoughts and learning experiences, as I try so hard to leave the past behind me, only looking back so I can grow and learn. I don't look forward, I honestly live in the moment; and that doesn't bother me at all - it's M E. I don't think of the future, I care about what is going on today. But I don't like to stay in the past of ugly thoughts, standing in hills of despair, I can't move or climb out because I'm stuck thinking of stupid crap instead of climbing out of the shadow darkness and seeing that beautiful sun that warms not only my face, but my heart and soul.

I want to be better than this. Why don't I live it more? Why can't I? Am I controlled? No, not in my sun-frame of mind! I'm letting the world of emotional crap and untamed thoughts and quick anger of negative overtones from my mouth get me down (and those around me) as it drags my big arse across the floor of disappointment.

And you know what? I don't like it.